Ok I’m still not sure we are in tune, let’s make sure we are on the same page with wires and conductors. The Wire or Cable and the number of conductors, a two wire is a cable with 2 conductors and a ground and a 3 wire has 3 conductors and a ground. I know that seems basic but I want to make sure we are both talking about the same thing.
In order to make your 3 way switch work you need to have 3 conductors that travel in between the two switches. A minimum of two conductors to the lights, and a two conductor to the panel. If your 3 wire travels through the lights before it gets to the second switch and there is not another cable to the lights, it will not work.
You can also check out
http://www.wireityourself.com/three_way_switch.htmlIf you would like we could arrange for you to email me the diagram, or you can post it here just hit the insert image button while making your reply.